A lot of times, a sex massage is better than sex itself. Our brains release the same chemicals during massages as they do during sex. Mindset is always very important. Introducing sex massages into a relationship can lead to an even more satisfying and enjoyable experience between the sheets. You should be entirely focused on your partner’s pleasure and relaxation.
Before giving them a massage, ask yourself how to keep your mind focused and how you can make the massage as pleasurable for them as possible. Mindset and environment are crucial aspects of a sex massage. Once you’ve got these covered, it’s time to develop the right technique. In this article, we share 9 that have stood the test of time.
1. Start Gently and Slowly
Every erotic massage should start with gentle caresses and strokes. These light and gentle touches get the blood flowing and prepare your partner for the massage. Start with a light touch using the palm of your hands. Strokes may be most common, but you can mix patterns up. Circular motions work too. These also cover the biggest surface area. Keep steady pressure and give each area of the body the same amount of focus.
2. Stretching
This technique provides great relief to people with stubborn areas or knots of stress. It involves manipulating their joints manually. Rotate their ankles and wrists gently, bend and stretch their elbows and knees, and make an effort to get their limbs as loose and free as you can without asserting pressure.
3. Invest in Quality Oils
No erotic massage stands a chance even with the best techniques when you don’t have a good quality oil or lubricant. Choose an organic product that smells nice and keeps the skin lubricated for a long time without irritating it.
4. The Resistance Technique
The resistance technique, which is often associated with deep tissue massages, is another way to get rid of stubborn knots. With your fingertips and thumb, apply gentle pressure to the knot. Move your fingertips around in circles. You’ll feel the knot start giving way. As you do, gradually increase the pressure. Vary pressure levels to keep things interesting. The degree of pressure will depend on your partner’s preference. If they’re the silent type, ask them if it’s too hard or too soft.
The key to a good sex massage is not being afraid to experiment with different types of touch and manipulation. Always consider your partner’s reactions.
5. Hold Hands
Holding hands is a nice, intimate way to move from an erotic massage to sex. Start the massage by taking your partner’s hand and rubbing the inside of the palm with your fingers. Then, you can turn their palm up and caress it. Squeeze the thumb side as you hold the wrist with one hand, then pull the thumb down to decompress it. You can repeat the technique on the side of the pinky with the other hand.
6. Kneading
Kneading is the easiest and most common massage technique. A sensual massage should be relaxing above all, and this does the trick like nothing else as long as you do it right. Using your fingertips and thumb, take the muscle tissue in between and gently squeeze at intervals of different length. This is really great for muscles of all sizes, but particularly the bigger ones, such as those in the upper arms, thighs, and buttocks.
7. Chopping
Don’t be fooled by the less than enticing name – this technique is a lot of fun to try and is very effective. It involves performing fast chopping motions. One option is using your fingertips to work out knots and bundles commonly found on the neck and lower back. Another includes using the side of your hand to make rapid, consistent motions to the surface of the upper back and thighs. It goes without saying that you shouldn’t hit hard. If done properly, this technique can be very soothing and will definitely relax a sensitive partner. You can move to other parts of the body once you’ve loosened the tension in the neck, back, legs, and shoulders. These areas usually need the most work.
8. Watch the Shoulders
The shoulders are almost always very tense, especially for people with office jobs that involve a lot of sitting and hunching over a computer screen. That’s why they should be the focal point of every massage. Apply mild pressure on areas that are hard or stiff. Use gentle strokes and avoid touching the bones. As you work, feel the muscles and watch for signs of relaxation or further tension.
9. Don’t Rely on your Thumbs
To soothe, relieve, and get someone in the mood for sex, a massage needs to last at least 30 minutes. However, you may find your thumbs are sore after just 10. If that’s the case, you have poor thumb technique. To be able to endure longer, don’t expect your thumbs to do all the work. To make things easier, you’ll need to put your whole body into the massage. You shouldn’t spend too much time pushing and squeezing with your fingers either. Exert pressure using your bodyweight. Even then, a massage shouldn’t last more than 50 minutes.
Sex massages are important for everyone, but especially women because women need more time to get in an erotic mood. A good massage will get her juices flowing in no time. It’s often stress and tension that prevents women from getting orgasms. Physical knots and kinks stop people from really feeling themselves and their partner during sex. Massages can provide great relief.
On a final note, don’t forget nothing matters more than focusing on your partner’s reactions to your touch. Use your intuition to see what they like and modify the routine if needed. Even if you master these techniques, don’t give in to the temptation to follow them too strictly. Erotic massages are not about getting stuck in a pattern. Be as creative as you can.
Dani Fogel. is a Communication Coordinator at Brandable, based in Los Angeles, CA. She works on the Queen V brand within the company’s Digital and Ecommerce department.